The night before I started this article, we watched the movie “She came to me”, a romantic comedy where Peter Dinklage plays a blocked composer who finds inspiration for his new opera, thanks to a sex and love addict boat captain (Marisa Tomei) who he sleeps with whilst being married to a neurotic therapist (Anne Hathaway) who herself aspires to become a nun. It was a bit bonkers and we cracked up many times. It felt good to settle in front of something light and off-the-wall.
I haven’t written for nearly three months and hopefully I don’t need a real life fantasising boat captain to get me back on track. Besides, the artistically talented one in the household happens not to be me. I have other talents upon which I have been recently invited to review. As it turns out, it’s always been a struggle to consider my writing one of them. Especially not in English. Give it a hiatus, it becomes even harder.
In a completely different screen category, we’re currently watching the series Dark Matter. I won’t attempt to give you the synopsis as it’s sci-fi and convoluted. I’m enjoying it though, with the added bonus that there is also a therapist and an artist in the story too. In the second episode, the main character (the so watchable Joel Edgerton) says to some students: “I do expect you to respect the opportunity”, followed by “pay attention, that’s all”.
That one liner stuck with me. I have been reflecting on it back and forth for a few weeks. It hasn’t left me. Especially the notion of ‘recognising’ an opportunity in the first place. Part of the answer lies in the above sentence itself: we need to pay attention. This partly takes us to really settle ourselves and focus on the truth deep within ourselves, where it’s quiet and spacious. This involves looking beyond our fears and wounding stories (as legitimate as they can be), beyond fabricated dreams which may not even be ours and then reaching out to what’s real. In order for an opportunity to be identified, it needs discernment which itself requires work, integrity, honesty.
Most people don’t see things or others for what they are, including opportunities. Therefore, can we really expect anyone to respect what they don’t perceive accurately in the first place?
Industries, countries, cultures, political parties, businesses, families, relationships are built on distortions, on misinterpretations, false stories, pain stories and sometimes blunt lies. It all seems true to them though and they don’t have any willingness to pay attention and question.
Because perceiving accurately also demands asking questions, of ourselves, of the situation, of the people in it. It creates the risk that something uncomfortable arises. It’s incredible the amount of energy people will spend to protect the lies versus seeking the truth. At this point, most people aren’t interested in truth, in light, nor are they in recognising a true opportunity.
In my therapy work, I help people see clearly. It may be a diminishing summary of what I do, but in essence I think that is it. It is one of my talents which possibly explains why I feel such a level of dedication and stubborn commitment to the pursuit of discernment, accurate perception and asking the right questions.
It’s important we don’t listen to the disillusioned part of ourselves which, when we look at the world, thinks: what’s the point? There is another part which thankfully says: it’s the whole point. The world needs pillars and guardians of what’s real, be it convenient, or most likely not.
Thank you for reading.
Mahé